Greg and Kat's blog

My earlier post about buying a Porsche has caused much conversation. Some people who I have told about the plan seem to think I’m going out to the dealer next weekend and blowing a lot of money. These people don’t see the inherent joy the plan contains.

You see, I don’t have to actually buy a Porsche for the plan to be wonderful. The plan is great all by itself: with or without a car. The point is that I could buy a Porsche in the not-unforeseeable future. How great is that?

When I told my mother the plan, she laughed appropriately. When I told her about people who interpreted the plan as me imminently heading out to buy, she replied “oh, you’re too cheap for that”. Gotta love her.

I also remembered that I can pinpoint the second I realized I needed a 911. It was when I first watched Top Gear series 10 episode 2. Jeremy Clarkson was reviewing the Audi R8. As they often do, another car was introduced as a counterpoint. Richard Hammond, being a huge 911 fan, offered the 911 Carrera S as a worthy competitor.

The car is introduced in a most dramatic fashion. I have extracted the piece of video that did it for me. Can you watch that and not want a 911? Any car that can be made to slide that far sideways has to be fun to own.

Personally, I’d prefer the Carrera 4S (the four wheel drive version). I’m not actually convinced of my ability to control a vehicle when I have to look out the side window to see where I’m going.

I have however been practicing in Gran Turismo (which doesn’t have Porsches, but still). As I have mentioned here before, I have a Logitech wheel and that gives the whole thing a certain amount of realism.

If I have learned nothing else from Top Gear, it’s that turning off the traction control makes cars more fun (if there’s nothing to hit and you’re not fussy about the condition of the tires). GT4 has traction control turned on for all cars by default, but it can be turned off in the settings screen. With the driving aids off, the powerful rear wheel drive cars seem to mock “you didn’t really think you could use the gas pedal and steering wheel at the same time, did you?”

I can foresee that, while I might not get a Porsche any time soon, Gran Turismo 5 and a PS3 may appear around here much sooner.

I know that a blog post with the title “Life Plan #3” should be preceded by life plans numbered 1 and 2. The thing is: life plans one and two have some actual realistic possibility of happening, so they aren’t as fun.

SFU’s CIO (Chief Information Officer) just quit. Or he “quit”. The rumours aren’t really clear. In any event, he don’t work here any more.

The CIO is basically an Associate VP Academic by another name. The position is responsible for the campus network infrastructure (including wireless), phones, computer store, email, WebCT, and a bunch of other stuff. Wait… there’s something else in there that’s important… what was it again… oh yeah!

The CIO is responsible for our information. The last guy was responsible for the purchase and subsequent support of PeopleSoft/SIMS/goSFU. You know: the millions-annually albatross around the University’s neck? Go ahead and read the “Peoplesoft in use” section on Wikipedia; I’ll wait. We bought in several years after those very public experiences. I have mentioned the SIMS project here before.

Amanda and a few others have opined that I should apply for the job. They forget two things: (1) I’m not qualified and (2) I don’t want to. I’m not qualified because one would need a hell of a lot more experience with managing both employees (I’d guess the headcount is easily >100) and budget (>$10M) than I have. Also, I’m pretty sure being an undergrad director isn’t sufficient qualification for being an associate VP.

The reasons I don’t want to do it are many. The biggest one is the most obvious: PeopleSoft. The only way to get away from PeopleSoft is to spend some money on another solution. There’s no money to do anything else because PeopleSoft costs so damned much. The person who gets the job is doomed to either spend even more money (in a time of cuts), or be the guy that keeps the shitty solution to the University’s biggest IT problem.

But (because Amanda knows me that well) I have been thinking about it. I’m the kind of guy that looks at the “Careers” section in the newspaper and thinks “CEO of a sporting goods company… yeah, I could do that. Maybe I should apply.”

If I had the job, I’d stop all development on SIMS and skim a quarter of the SIMS budget off for internal development of a replacement. The replacement would have to happen piecemeal, which would require a very clever architecture that could interface with the existing database. If other Universities in BC were willing to team up, it would make sense to join forces since our business practices are mostly similar and we could share most of the code.

Also, there’d be some modernization of the core campus IT infrastructure. Things like virtual machines and AFS would allow real-time replication of essential services across campuses, and leave us much less vulnerable to catastrophic system failures.

In summary: if they don’t hire in the first round and open up applications a second time, I’m going for it.

I have been watching a lot of Top Gear recently. Top Gear is a British car show: I have been describing it as three middle-aged idiots playing with cars. Their motto is “ambitious, but rubbish”, which pretty fairly describes the challenges they are given.

My favourite challenge, by a wide margin, is when the three of them try to prove that British Leyland made decent cars. That video is about a half hour long, but well worth watching. If don’t howl with laughter during the rough-road test, you just aren’t trying. I love it when one of them almost falls down laughing at another. It happens a lot.

They also spend a lot of time driving outrageously expensive supercars that I could go a lifetime without seeing, let alone driving. Basically, car porn. All of this has made me remember that I actually like driving: I just haven’t ever owned a fun car to drive. Clearly, I need a sports car. Stay with me here…

Now, a nice Ferrari or Lamborghini runs somewhere upwards of $200k, but a Porsche 911 or Lotus Elise is more in the $100k range. A Porsche Cayman is a damn nice car too and lists new for only about $60k.

That’s certainly downright affordable, but I’m not proposing that I buy a brand new Porsche. As with all cars, these things depreciate a lot in the first few years of ownership (which is approximately the time interval between becoming a doctor/lawyer and having a child, forcing you to sell your sports car and get an atrocious SUV). A used 911 that’s in solidly good condition can be had about $50k.

After the first few years, depreciation on such a car should be relative to how much it is driven, not its age: if it’s driven occasionally, well-maintained, and kept in a garage, it should resell for a good price. Fuel economy in one of these cars isn’t actually bad either: they’re so light that the big engine doesn’t have to work terribly hard.

That brings me to the real plan: get a gently-used cheap car (a Yaris, Civic, etc.) and use that for everyday driving. Get a used 911 for occasional fun-driving. Come on… how can you not want that?

Imagine the joy of it: pack an overnight bag, throw it in the 911, and go to the Okanagan (the hard way, through Manning Park) for the weekend. Marvel at the tool beside you that paid only $10k less than you for his ugly, boring SUV.

Of course, we’d have to have a garage to put it in. So, buy a house first. Also, our current car has been making a different noise for the last few weeks. That probably has to be replaced first too. Kat should probably have a job to make it all affordable. Kids are out too, but that was the plan anyway. So, some time in the next decade, this plan may be implementable.

What was most surprising was that Oli and Tina had been watching Top Gear as well, and Oli had the exact same thoughts at the exact same time. He wants the Elise.

Strangely, when I mentioned this plan to Kat, she didn’t really seem to think it was a bad idea. I think it’s a trap.

I have been following the US Democratic Primary. I do this partially because I’m affected by the outcome, as the winner will have a non-trivial effect on my life as a Canadian, and partially because it’s more-or-less as interesting as American Idol as reality TV goes.

Frankly, I’m starting to get a little tired of it. It’s starting to take on the character of a crappy romantic comedy where you know it’s going to end with the girl getting the guy, but you still have to sit through 45 minutes of charming misunderstandings before you can go home. Let me explain…

Fact #1: Obama is going to win the pledged delegate count: Slate does a good job of explaining why. Clinton has only won one state with the 64% she would have to get in all of the remaining contests to come out on top. Even wackiness with Florida and Michigan wouldn’t get Clinton into the lead.

Fact #2: The superdelegates won’t overturn the pledged delegates. Many prominent democrats are against it, it would cause a crazy civil war in the party, and my guess is that it would cost them the general election.

So, Obama’s going to win the Democratic nomination. Congratulations. Why do I still have to read about the whole thing in every other Digg headline? I know the media has a vested interest in keeping things going, but come on.

Given that the protracted contest is supposed to be bad for eventual nominee, why aren’t the superdelegates putting me out of my misery? All they have to do is give a quick speech about how they’re going to honour the will of the electorate and support Obama. They get to be on the winning side and “save” the party. Somebody with a few stones could also suggest that it was time for Clinton to call it a race too.

Bill Richardson just did exactly that and it will probably get him a cabinet seat. If a few high profile superdelegates came out on Obama’s side, it would pretty much seal the deal. Any idea why others aren’t following suit?

This morning’s keynote talk at SIGCSE was by Marissa Mayer who is the Google VP of Search Products & User Experience. As she was giving a really good talk, I looked her up in Wikipedia.

Apparently, she was born in 1975. Fuck. That’s the same year I was born.

She did some user studies for Google during her MSc and went to work there when she was done. She did more user studies there, and worked on the original Google web server. She’s also a much better speaker than I am.

So, while I’ve been pissing around teaching a bunch of punk kids computing science, this chicky* has been getting rich by being brilliant. Seriously brilliant: she knows her shit, and it’s very clear from listening to her.

Sigh. Is there an English word that combines the concepts of “crush” and “envy”? I have that.

(*) chicky (chĭkē) n. A woman who is probably often underestimated by misogynists because she is young and attractive, shortly before they find themselves in her wake wondering what happened to their testicles.

I spent my day hanging around Portland. It’s a nice city: one of the few places I’ve been recently and thought “yeah, I could see living here.” Kat assures me that I’ll think the same thing about San Francisco, which is a good reason to go there some time.

The city is quite walkable, so I wandered around a bunch. There’s also a light-rail transit system that’s free in the city centre: it’s basically like the Skytrain, but not in the sky. So, a “train”.

Kerry was right about taking the time to go to Powell’s Books. I wasn’t inspired to buy anything, but mostly because I wasn’t in a buying mood. It’s a very cool bookstore, with new and used books mixed together on the shelves.

It’s back to work tomorrow.

I’m passing through Toronto as I write this (but posting it after I got back to Vancouver, as I’m too cheap to pay for wireless). There was a crazy snowstorm yesterday in Toronto. Things are cleared now, and my flights weren’t affected.

There are still a lot of people around the airport, standing in lines for customer service, or whatever other airline person will talk to them. I guess a lot of connections must have been cancelled: maybe to airports that took the storm later, or were hit harder.

The people in these lines are the subject of my travel tip:

If you find yourself in an airport needing to fix your flight, don’t wait in a line. Phone the airline. There will invariably be hundreds or thousands of other people in the same situation as you. There’s no hope of the staff in the building dealing with it quickly. Phone their toll-free number (it’s probably on your itinerary or boarding pass) and jump to the front of the line.

The operator should be able to rebook you, and give you a confirmation number. From there, you’re home-free and just need to check back in.

To be fair, there were also a lot of people bumming around for standby, probably after their original flight was cancelled. I have no good tip for those people.

Daylight savings time day: +1:00.

East coast to west coast: -3:00.

Traveling on DST day: -2:00. One less hour of jetlag. Score.

My six-word story: I’m here and Mario Galaxy rocks.

I’m pretty much hanging around in Chapel Hill, trying to get some work done while Kat’s in the lab. (She’s doing full days, trying to get the science done so she can come home as soon as possible.)

I decided to set the reasonable goal for the week of getting my email under control. I’m down from probably 270 messages in my inbox to 180. If I can get it down under 100 and handle all of the “my mark is wrong” ones from my distance ed class, I’ll be pleased.

But then, Ryan (a lab tech in Kat’s lab) lent us Super Mario Galaxy. That’s costing me. I just got the second power star. If nothing else, it’s a solidly long game.

or “How to take a redeye from the west to east coast.”

I usually fly redeye (aka overnight) flights when coming east. I have had some disbelieving reactions to this like “Did you save a lot of money?” Sometimes, but that’s not really why.

The setup: Flying from Vancouver to Toronto or Ottawa takes about 4.5 hours. Counting in the 3 hour time change, that just about equals “overnight”. The last flights leave at 11:00 or so.

The prelude: I can get in a full day of work (or whatever) before leaving. The airport run happens after rush hour, and at a time that people are generally more willing to give me the ride.

Airport arrival: First thing at the airport: take a sleeping pill (Sleep-Eze or whatever). Check in and go through security. It only takes a few minutes, since there are few flights at that time. Eat somewhere in there and buy a bottle of water past security. About 10 minutes before boarding time, brush teeth.

The flight: The sleeping pill should be starting to kick by boarding. Put on sunglasses (since I can never be bothered with a mask). Ignore everything and get as much sleep as possible.

The connection: I am generally making a connection to North Carolina. That involves going through US customs at the Toronto airport at about 6:00. No lines, and the agents are still half asleep. For some reason, I sleep better on the second flight: I have slept through the takeoff and usually wake up when somebody tells me to put my chair up.

All-told, I usually get a little more than a half night’s sleep. That leaves me a little screwed up the next day. But, consider the alternative: if I hadn’t taken the redeye, I would have spent the whole day on a plane. This way, I can lounge around, take a nap and be good. As an added bonus, I can go to sleep whenever I want the next night, and jetlag is suddenly a non-issue.

The math doesn’t work out for east to west, though.